Posts tagged "recovery" — Page 2
The reason most people find healing so hard is that they’ve had so little help, so little guidance, and so little information. Emotional recovery can be, and should be, a joyous journey. People who get the right pieces in place find that:
- healing moves fast.
- some gains are immediate, with many more to follow.
- the pleasure greatly outweighs the pain.
- the parts that do involve hard work are so rewarding that the underlying feeling remains, “I can totally do this.”
- healing is not a solitary undertaking, and it leads rapidly to greater and greater connection …
If you’re still alive, there’s still time. You can gain back a vibrant, connected, satisfying life. Pain, anxiety, and isolation do not need to dominate.
— The Joyous Recovery, Lundy Bancroft
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Aesop’s The Farmer and the Viper
A Farmer walked through his field one cold winter morning. On the ground lay a Snake, stiff and frozen with the cold. The Farmer knew how deadly the Snake could be, and yet he picked it up and put it in his bosom to warm it back to life.
The Snake soon revived, and when it had enough strength, bit the man who had been so kind to it. The bite was deadly and the Farmer felt that he must die. As he drew his last breath, he said to those standing around:
Learn from my fate not to take pity on a scoundrel.
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But are you ready for joy, really?
Are you ready to be the person who does not suffer from this compulsion? Who does not obsess about _______?
Who does not act against your own self-interest in such a pernicious way?
Are you ready to let go of not only the behavior of _______, but also the very consciousness of the person who _______?
Are you ready for _______ to no longer even be a big deal in your life?
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What is dread? It is a feeling that you will experience some unknown and unnamed doom if you proceed.
But why would a person feel dread about saving some money, or securing private documents, or gathering information about a possible life change? The answer can be found in what these women all had in common. They were all acting, or about to act, on their own behalf without permission from a man …
An unwritten taboo that is still built into most cultures is about the subjugation of women.
The evil taboo: “You may not act without permission from a man.”
The fear: “Acting on your own behalf will bring you harm.”
— Victory Over Verbal Abuse, Patricia Evans
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The Four Questions
Q1. Is it true?
Q2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
Q3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
Q4. Who would you be without that thought?
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